I'm famous - so my words mean more...

I kind of wonder anyone can answer this ponder. If two people speak and say the same thing, one a normal person and the other a celebrity. Both speak the same words of positivity and uplifting. Yet one was all but ignored because it came from someone who lives an ordinary life without the name behind it. The other some famous person that has a large amount of money, social status and maybe a sense of license to grace humanity with a sense of public consciousness. Who would one believe? I ask this for the simple reason that I consider how so many people can follow the shepherd of the famous - as if his words will lead the flock of the non-elite to Nirvana.

It makes me laugh how so many of those famous people just go out and do those commercials for one saying oh do this, give that, help this and blah blah blah. Now I am all for those that do have a genuine cause, or a worthwhile charity. I am all for that. But I do consider myself thinking of this. How many these folks actually cough up the money they ask many of the viewers and citizens. I am like hell you make a few million dollars a year, you cough up most the cash for whatever. Think you can use the tax write-off anyway right? Think my poor $.52 a day going to help. I remember someone say oh yeah 52 cents (the price for a cup of coffee can help feed some starving guy in Africa.) I'm thinknig like where the hell is that place right now. I wanna eat for fiddy-two cents a day. And I know many more who do too. Today, you can't even get bubble gum that cheap. Oh how I miss those days.

And the other I have to get a good chuckle at is all those who just post all these videos and posts of all these positive, uplifting, motivational words of good merit, cheer and hoopla, that I know about 100 folks who don't have the platinum charge card from American Express and the common gentry laps it up like snozzeberry icecream from wonka's factory. I guess it is true the messenger is more important the message one gives. Yet, I wonder, do many of these people believe what they even say or is it just a ploy - or a case of absolute bullshittery (yes that is a word). And I do ask, if you have a friend who can say the same thing, may not in so many words, or so many others who follow them like a shadow. But, you sometimes need to ask - where is the credibility of those paid endorsers of the common welfare? Ever wonder they just say most of this out of pure sincerity, or are they just entrapping the mind with scented words that can cause you to fall for anything with no substance? Now, I know many others would say the same thing. There is always an agenda for everyone - but do you fall for the one who captures the masses with the honeyed words of falsity, or the ordinary Joe Schmo?

Who knows, maybe writing this entry, or even keeping this blog is the thing that so many others (well those who have bank statements that look like my phone number). I don't know. Difference is that I just bring a harsh reality of enlightenment. I don't consider myself to be anything motivating - but maybe in twisted way, I could be. Who knows. Yet, I ain't famous...except in my own head. I'm pretty popular there.

SAW

Love is in the air...

so why does it smell like sulphur and rancid milk?

I am not one to be a bitter Betty but, it just something that I been pondering allot as of late. Has this become a summer of love? With new romances, June/July weddings and the like, you kind of have to ask yourself is there something in the air that is becoming all amore - amore (that's international talk - I tend be like that at times) It kind of laugh at all the many that just run towards the summer fling. All full of intense fervor, like a fireball in the sky, or a comet, comes brightly - shines on and then fades away. While some may linger around ( some like a bad canker or a stubborn bill collector ) and have a long term relationship. While others will fade away like the seasons. With memories, potential lawsuits or even a positive test for a baby or a notice of a court order to pay child support. WHO knows how those seasonal escapades can end  or evolve.

I guess with all the nonsense and trouble in the world, maybe a bit of love or something is necessary, if for anything but peace of mind. Not that a good bottle of Don Julio and a plate of wings can't provide that same need. Or maybe that is me. Who knows?

I just find it funny how many people just post all kinds of love related nonsense and the amazing inspirational, romantic pictures and quotes and all that crap you find when one is in that state of mind.

Hear something like..ooh love with the right person makes all troubles seem nothing - a blah blah blah. I can come up with about 30 cynical and quirky comebacks and believe me, I have. Yet, I hate to be a killjoy to them. No matter how tempted I want to, how much it would give me a bit of sadistic pleasure to be the storm on the sunny day of the world. I'm a villain damnit...you expect lollipops and dandilions here? HELL NO!

I think I will compose up a list of evil retorts for those love quotes and stuff and give it a bit of harsh logic. May as well. For there must be balance and why not give the darkside of all that equal time. It's the least I cna do right?

So if love is in the air...please make sure you are not passing a set of burning tires...

Looking Back....Looking Forward

I took me a while to really write this entry. Not because of the subject matter that I am discussing, but to really speak what I wanted to say to really give this justice. I know this time of year is a big "rite of passage" for so many people in terms of their lives beginning. Mostly, those who completed the big hurdle in their lives. Me graduating high school so many years ago - I can only count the years for I am getting old; I thought that is was just the biggest accomplishment in my life. Something that I worked hard to do and to share it with my family and my friends, many of them that walked the same journey with me from day 1. I can't say that I begun with them. Being transplanted from Oakland to Mississippi, I will admit was kind of a big change. Yet, in retrospect, I can hardly remember the times of Kindergarten and 1st Grade. Not clearly. Yet, 2nd grade unto that May night in 1994, I can remember those times fondly. The classes (some I kind of slept through YAWN), hamburger Friday, and the recces time. Lockers (which I rarely used), to homeroom (which to this very day, I still try to find out the purpose for that. - I wonder has anyone in the history of education ever failed homeroom.) Study-Hall, which I still think, does anyone every study there? I know I never did.

Then I think of my days back high school - 4 years that really say help define me as the person I am today. Being a realist, learning history (helping pass a class in the process), discussing conspiracy theories in Mr. Wade's class, to debating the topics of the day - only because if just play the devil's advocate. But the most fondest thing about it are the people, those that I call my friends. In a sense, it was a family, because in many aspects, we spent more time together than our actual family. (well it would seem the case.)

But, like many things, time passes, people lose touch, and we all grow up on the paths that we all walk. Some got married, have children on their own, followed their dreams, accomplished whatever they sought out to do. One thing that I can say about Facebook, is that it did reconnect many of us that it would be difficult to find - even those that lived in the same neighborhood. :P Yet, looking at so many now accomplish much, it does my heart proud to see so many do so much. (so may not achieved what they thought they would back in high school, yet you may done more than you expect and tomorrow is a day of ambition and never too late to do it.

Now looking back, I smile. Looking forward I smile at the possibility of what is ahead. A circle that widens with new experiences, new people that come in as well. But, where it starts are those that were there from the beginning. And me personally, before I was a cynic, before I was a villain, before I was just an overall ass, I was Marco. It is said  you don't know where you are going until you know where you come from. I know I came from Morton, Mississippi. I carry that place in my heart wherever I go. Sadly there is no K's Korner in Dallas and I can't get that teleport platform working or I be there stocking up on burgers.

Now, I look at the raining night in May, we all left the nest, planted new roots, raising a new generation and looking ahead to the future. I don't know where it may take me, but I know, as I knew then it will be something grand. Some those that have now reached this milestone. Know the future is bright and yours to take. Your story is to be written, as ours were. Make it a grand one. Look forward and start your journey.

With one step.

SAW 

Step right up...place your bets...

I know I'm going to catch all kinds of hell for this. Yet, then again, when I ever not got flak for many things I speak, ponder and heaven help anyone who ever takes a stroll in my mind. You would lose your damn sanity - and I would be on trial. But, I digress. The question I ponder, my people is it wrong for me to place personal odds and bets on relationships and stuff? I know that Vegas has put up odds on how long relationships last for several celebrities and I usually consider if I was a betting man and if there was a set of odds on how long folks relationships can or would last. I look at how much logic and reason can pull out the odds and we place it on such a board...

but in many cases, I know that it would a bit higher..

Now don't want to sound like a total ass-hat and cold to such a change in one's romantic status.Yet, I'm just a villain, what else would one such as I do. I can do all the best luck and wishes and all that. BUT, sometimes I have to consider. If there was bets and odds places and I can make a wager, I would. Hell I heard they had odds on how long Kim Kardashian's marriage would last and I would think there be a few that would be raking in the cash. And lord  knows, there folks I know that I can step up a betting table and be like I want to put this on this being less than 6 months at 3 to 1 and I be like...

KA-CHING!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I would be a rich villain with a few less friends but then again, with this, I could rent new friends. Call me a hater if you want, I call it being opportunistic. However, if I'm wrong, I would stand up and admit I'm wrong.

But, I doubt that I'm wrong. Alas...but that's how I roll cause I'm a villain....don't believe me...see this

we all going to place bets on that new relationship. We are the odds now...20 to 1....who got $20??

SAW

No good deed goes unpunished...

and no bad deed goes unrewarded.

Me being the nice, considerate and overall gentleman that I am...(no jokes from the nuts in the peanut gallery I can be damnit!) But I digress. I tried to do something so nice and stuff and I feel that I need to share it with my people.

I was at some local eatery today for lunch and I saw two women that were preparing to leave and one of them pretty much had decided to leave without her makeup being touched up appropriately. And me being the good guy that I am decided to help this individual with making sure her facepaint was good to go. Now mind you, this person was a card carrying member of the Sharpie Nation. YES, friends, she had the eyebrows all done up in the Sharpie manner. And some of it was running of, I don't know it was cause she was sweating more than a crackhead with a bank loan application or what. SO, what I done was reach into my bag and pull out a Sharpie and say, I think you can use this to touch up your eyebrows and don't mind if you can use it to get it done. Well, needless to say, she was pretty offended by the notion and just stormed off, greatly insulted. Well, all I can say was seeesh, try to help some folks and they get all bent out of shape. Heaven knows, she already look like she could pass for one of Mr. Potatohead's bastard kids and I for one was trying to help her out. I guess she was mad because, she was wanting a different color than I had. Maybe she wanted the red or the lavender Sharpie. Who knows.

So in short, my people, never attempt to give out any makeup aid to those who clearly need it. It can become more problems than solutions. And for my Sharpie, do not fear. It may not want to touch such bad skin anyway.

But, then again, we must stop and curtail the Sharpie abuse...just say NO TO Sharpie Abuse!

Stop the madness!!!

SAW

When the doors open for others...

sometimes it's best to close it behind them and go the other way.

I know many kind of wonder what is the meaning behind this quote. And yes it's made by me. I doubt that it will ever be remembered for the sake of history as a quotation of worth. However, for me, it means allot. How so you may ask? Guess, that is what this entry is about.

Over the last few months, I have seen many people who I known for years, some not so much go through several changes that for the most part prove extremely positive. I won't go into many semantics with it, but to sum it up, I'm quite happy for them. Many had to fight battles that I don't know if I had the strength or capacity to endure - yet I know many of those same individuals would never be able to carry what I had either. Yet, this is not a contest of such. There plenty of doors we enter in life; such that leads to opportunities, growth, success and the like. The saying that when one door closes another opens. But, I think that includes people as well. Sometimes, many must move back or leave or be left behind for others to move forward. This isn't always a negative thing. Granted, some can be attributed to drama, arguments and the like. However, there are cases when you are meant for a finite period. Do what was necessary or fulfill a purpose and move on. There also just rare moments, you are only there to witness others become what they are destined to be and that's it.

But, then there those few who are just there to close the doors others enter and go the other way while others go forward. If for any reason than to ensure those who have improved their own selves not regress back. For myself, I been such a doorman. I feel for a long time just a person to bare witness for many others or to be just that one person to point in the direction of success, greatness, happiness, etc and then close the door behind them. In doing so, I have kind of been fading out of lives. Like the moments between dreams and consciousness. Over time to be a memory and then nothing. Many times not even a goodbye is needed or necessary. For many years, I have left behind many people and never as much gave as much as a wave,a handshake or even words, "So long." I never really knew why but I guess, it was easier to be forgotten this way. From those at home, to my time in Houston, then Hattiesburg, to Irving and even now. It just makes it easier to server those ties that bind me here. Some are harder than others I will admit. Other times, it's as simple as turning around and going the other direction.

Now, for those who have found whatever they wanted or wished for, it's time for me to take my leave and back away. Maybe it's selfish of me to be so, many say why not be part of it and have it shared. Honestly, that never been me. Granted it's their choice to do so, yet it's my choice to politely refuse, or just not be there to do it. As I said, it can be selfish but sometimes in life, we have to be. While I know the core people will still be there, mostly my family, there others that it won't be as difficult to slip away. I did what I was meant to do and now time to be a the one to close the door behind those who are moving on.

And what of me? What is next for me, that is a question that really has no answer for I don't know. I go where the winds blow and walk till fate, chance, whim or whatever brings me to someone else and start over again. Looking at names, numbers - so easy to delete and walk on, and many more would never notice you not there. Yet happy to know that they are where you don't have to be thought of to begin with. So those who have walked though that door, do not worry, I will close it behind you.

It's the least I can do...

SAW

Maybe it's just me but....

as of late, I just been seeing so many posts on Facebook with signs asking everyone to like, and share for this for some stupid thing or another. Or please like and share to locate someone. Maybe it's the cynic in me, maybe I'm just the traditional asshole that so many have come to know and love but I have this great notion stop me if you heard this before but why not...

do it your damn self - work to get whatever you are wanting and search for what you are looking for on your own.

Just saying. I guess now of days the social media has been transformed into the begging, locator and depository of self-justification.

I will probably get allot of hate mail for this but, I can give 2 shades of a damn about it. I just feel that way and honestly, I'm shocked nobody has not said anything about it. Yet. I should just go head and be like them and see if I can get a million views, posts, or comments on this blog. Now that would something. The again I would be charged for the same hypocrisy. And I ain't got no time for that. Don't believe me..let my friend say it for me...

So in closing, I really hope that folks can actually stop with that nonsense of posting signs in needs of likes. I mean seriously, you think anyone will get a million likes for you to get a puppy or a tickets to a game, or any crap like that. I probably doubt it but oh well...let's see if my favorite Star Trek Captain can help with my dislike...

Live long and prosper.... 

SAW