So nerdy guys are in now...

 

  I am seeing all these videos of women out here saying that nerdy guys are underrated and slept on, and you need to be dating them. And I been looking at so many responses stating that most of these women are straight capping or lying for clout. While I know many would say yes, it is cap. I know a few of them sincerely are loving us nerdy guys. And to them, I say thank you and bless you for giving those dudes a genuine shot. However, the others, I know that it's just a bunch of bullshittery. 

I know that those so called "Nerd" types they are wanting are those tall, attractive, tattooed guys that maybe wear glasses and watch maybe one anime and build Legos and whatnot. To be honest, I think they think that nerd prototype of nerdy men they want are the Henry Cavil (who plays Warhammer) Vin Diesel and Joe Manganiello who play D&D or Ryan Reynolds for the most obvious of reasons. They want those attractive guys that have some sex appeal but have a bit of embrace of being a nerd. But those who been knee-deep into it, being ridiculed in school for liking comics, anime, etc. were laughed at and still laughed at to this day because we don't have a six-pack, or tatted up and all that jazz is a bit tiring, and I know many of guys like-minded are seeing the bullshit for what it is. 

I am not one to try to gatekeep about who dates who in the nerd lifestyle; I am only asking that you be honest about it. Because I know that maybe 85% that say they do are lying out their heads for some type of clout or give some poor sap a very false hope. Many of us guys are over-cautious by nature because we know the traps are out there that we try to get some feelings only to get burned and played. It's why we don't date in the first place. It's hard to trust, hard to believe because many of us have our war stories of how we try to find some woman who has the slightest interest in us, see our existence and run away back to the gym rat or something. I know many of those so-called nerd lovers are psy-ops who probably have an Onlyfans or something. I know not ever woman has that ulterior motive or some sex-worker website and is genuinely interested in us. Then there is the classical defense saying, "Oh there are those who are into nerdy guys who are not usually on the cover of those dime store romance novels, they just not into you because of your personality." I agree, unattractive is unattractive regardless of your situation, but sometimes the circumstances at the time does bring out some things or say things that are normally not what we say or believe. It's just that for some long, we been slept on, ignored, laughed at and ridiculed that now suddenly a spotlight is shone on us, and we have to ask ourselves is this legit, or cap. Most of us are overthinkers by nature and we have to ask ourselves billions of times is this true or not. 

Is it the cynic in me that is just seeing the pessimistic part of everything? Yes, but there is too much evidence to back up the claim too. So, when I see these individuals say they wanna date a nerdy guy, I know it's the ones that you don't expect. Hell, most think they are tall, skinny guys who probably watch Star Wars and plays Magic the Gathering and have a predisposition of being secretly hung like an anaconda or something. Or that gym guy with tatts and a beard that maybe has an insane number of Legos. To each their own, I guess. But some of us don't fit that mold and would like some sense of acknowledgement too. Hell, most would think I don't even fit the nerd culture. But let's see.

Love Anime (Can name shows that isn't Naruto, Bleach (top 5 favorite btw), Dragonball or One Piece)

Plays Warhammer (even before Henry Cavil told the world he did)

Plays Magic the Gathering

Collects Gundam Models 

Reads Sci-Fi

Loves Star Wars 

Loves Science/Astrophysics Shows

Hardcore Gamer

Love Conspiracy Theories 

I Play Massive Amounts of Trivia Games

Read Loads of Comics 

yeah, those things I am into but not 6 foot, not skinny cause I like to eat, and you know the rest. 

I guess I shouldn't care about all this, but I guess it just rubs me the wrong way to see people giving out false hopes to people like us for the simple fact that we have a different lifestyle that all of a sudden is supposed to be cool when less than 10 years ago it was frowned upon. I rather stay alone with my nerdiness than fall into a trap. Just safer that way. 

SAW

Some people are social butterflies...

 

And then there are people like me who are pretty much the equivalent of a social cockroach. I think throughout my years of engaging in the Social Experiment, I have really attempted to engage in much of social situations only to really fade into the background and just observe. Mostly because I am not one of those people who can just walk into a room and float around and speak with everyone in such a friendly manner. That has been something that I never could master, or even try to attempt. Mostly because it feels so damn awkward for me. 

The parties and engagements that I used go to, while were not as many as some would assume, I mostly kept to a very select group of people and even then, for very few moments because I just honestly felt like I was really there as a forced conversation or convenience at the best of times. So, I usually just stay there briefly and make my ceremonial exit. Not really being missed or thought of for many. 

I do think that at times I have an ability to make people forget that I was there after a few moments. You kind of question yourself and think was I even there or was it just a fleeting thought that I was there at all. It does work to my advantage sometimes; however, there are times when I do think does my existence, play any impactful role in other's lives. It used to be a question that I would ask myself hundreds of times over the years. Now as I have gotten older, I honestly think I already know the answer however I don't think like I like that solution. 

Many years ago, during the Yahoo Chat Era, I have come across so many people of so many different backgrounds, nationalities. Some I keep in touch with loosely, some I avoided or been avoided for some reason or another. Good or ill. But it all goes to question; did I ever, even briefly, make any type of effect on their lives by me being there. I don't think I have if I was to be honest with myself. I don't think if anyone was to mention my name it would be any fondness if there is any memory at all. It is sometimes something I wish I could just do, wipe out the memories of me from many people. Or wipe it from myself as well. I think that much of the traumas that I had endured would have been lessened greatly if I could just pluck those memories out like an eyebrow. I know some would say that you shouldn't do that because those experiences are what makes humans grow and become who they are. But I question them with this counter-question. Do you think those individuals would probably find a greater sense of happiness and fulfillment of the Self, if they did not encounter those things that have messed them up to a point where they struggle with their lives? 

I think I have become so socially withdrawn that I have de-evolved into a recluse, and I think that is a good thing for me. I think growing up pretty much a loner, gave me a deeper understanding of being able to be independent and self-reliant. It was for the lack of effort or even planting myself in those socio-groups, I just think deep down I was just a person who had much of the social acceptance of the aforementioned cockroach. I know that you should be oneself, but the question to ask is what happens if being yourself makes one an outcast? 

I guess that is a question to ask. I just hope that I don't lose my sanity once I find the answer. 

SAW