Maybe this is my cynical side of me blaring out...

then again, I know this is my cynical side coming out. Who the hell am I fooling? But, I just need to know, asked by the gentleman concerned. Why in the holy hell do stores have to break out holiday merchandise almost 2 months early? I mean I saw Valentines shit popping out in all the stores December 26th. I just have to think..what person is going to buy candy almost 2 months early? Don't some of that candy have like short shelf lives. And really what guy is going to be buying that candy and flowers, hide for almost a month and then give it to significant other. Yeah get the flowers today and give it to her a months later; red roses become black and dead. Yeah, you will be getting your ass a one way trip to your couch (and you will be lucky if you have a couch. You may be sleeping on the front porch...while your replacement be putting his shoes under your bed.)

I guess the stores have to think ooh let's get reminders for folks to buy up stuff. Just what idiot is going to buy it. Don't anyone know that many of the gift getters are procrastinators? Unless, they bout to cough up 3 grand for a ring, or a trip to some romantic place. Or make some reservations at a restaurant paying up 2 weeks salary for food that is over-priced but have to pay for the ambiance. Wanna take a date to a place with ambiance, take one to Waffle House.   Yes I said W A F F L E H O U S E!! How can I be such a romantic.

And besides, don't the stores know that those candies are always on sale the day after a holiday occurs. When the candy is 50% off or higher. I will admit, I do be ripping up the Kitt Katts on sale. So you can best believe on February 15th (which is known as National Breakup Day), I will be getting my candy fix. Mmmm and who I'm buying if for...MYSELF!!!!

And here is a Valentine Tip for you shoppers...better believe that love have a price tag for this year and if you don't have have tag met or exceeded...you will catch the hell.

Wanna bet that I'm wrong....test this theory....go for it...